I hope they go undefeated and score 1,000 points per game. I hope they melt the arenas in which they play because they make the ball move so beautifully, and so quickly, that the air becomes super-heated with the vigorous masturbation of the assembled angelic hosts of heaven. I hope Kevin Durant, Steph Curry, Klay…

Joe Lacob had a team of Silicon Valley programmers create a secret algorithm that determined “Adding Kevin Durant is good.” Will the disruption ever end?

Everyone is a responsible gun owner until, you know, suddenly they aren’t.

Give Girardi a break; Vince Vaughn has been doing it for more than a decade.

Big deal. Toronto spends millions and doesn't have an NHL team either.

Rangers could have taken Claude Giroux back in ‘06. Instead, we got Bobby Sanguinetti.

I have every sympathy for these teachers. Little Hudson is a fucking idiot.

I think if 2016 has taught us anything, it’s that extremely bad hair is not a deterrent to grossly defrauding the public.

There’s a typo in your article. You forgot an “O” in “doomed” in the second paragraph.

Him x 17m right now.

As someone who has had personal interactions with this humanoid and knows people who have suffered through working with her as well, that title is super accurate.

To each their own. I find it a revolting encapsulation of everything wrong with people.

I’m hearing LeBron is going to sign with:

Why don’t they just circulate the real story of Dennis Hastert raping boys right here at home?

There is never any shame in getting beaten by someone who is just plain better than you are, only in not giving it your all. I’ve been following the USMNT since it has been good enough to actually be on television (1990) and we have come so, so far. While we still have a long way to go, I remain optimistic. Hell, if…

Hot Take incoming: Going off of the list of sports LeBron could excel at from yesterday’s Fun Bag I’m prepared to say that Lebron could have stopped that Messi free kick.

Found him

I mean, sure, if marriage had a maximum length of 4 years and was based on performing a certain service in return for compensation that was capped based on revenues of all marriages.

my less than accurate counting has discovered there’s been 14 in the NHL during that time and 24 in MLB. Oddly, there’s been a total of ZERO in the NFL.

@cmdrfire: Much easier to read a headline and then post a comment than read the whole post. Who reads anymore anyway, that's pre-9/11 stuff.