100% agree. If I were the fiancée on the other end of this, I’d want to know what kind of filth I married ASAFP.

Thanks for the tip, I had no idea that was even a thing! (but now I can’t look away)

How dare she come at Mary Poppins like that. Girl, bye.

Mom and Dad at Disneyworld, circa 1974 or so. I wish I had a better shot of the plaid bellbottoms pop is definitely wearing here

You’re coming from a conservative Christian standpoint, aren’t you? Something about your word choice reminds me of every stern high school teacher who admonished us “not to cause the boys to stumble” with our uniform skirts.

Makes sense!

FL native here - though this took place in Palm Beach County, I think it actually happened in Lake Worth (about 10 miles south of Palm Beach proper)

YES! I hadn’t really noticed it until recently when I blew up at my boyfriend for no real reason (then my period started the next day). It’s a little bit worrisome, but I still think this is a much more convenient/reliable method for me than the pill - I don’t trust myself to be responsible enough to take a pill at…

That happened to me, too! My mom cut mine into a bob after my refusal to let her brush my hair led to a massive knot made of other smaller knots. It wasn’t so much a punishment as a hygiene thing, but what this dad did is so gross and wrong.

I got Nexplanon (the arm implant) last year, and I'm super pissed that my period hasn't totally disappeared like it usually does :( though shorter and lighter is better than what I had going on before

She and I have the same birthday (month date and year) so this story always stuck with me, too. She is an incredibly strong person, I’m so glad she made it out the other side of this.

I once flew with my cousin and her 10-month old. Baby’s ears got plugged up during takeoff so she was crying for a while, and a man sighed loudly before saying, “You should just put your hand over her mouth!” (um, maybe I’ll just put my hand over YOUR mouth, guy)

They are, actually. If you’re sitting in a row with no seats in front of you, you’re required (by law? regulations? I dunno, you just are) to put your carryon in the overhead bins.

I agree with you in some ways - but remember the time she wrote a (maybe) post-sex heartbreak song about sentient genital wart John Mayer? http://jezebel.com/5667599/did-jo…

Your Olive Garden reminds me of my graduation story – I’m the youngest of 5 kids, so my college graduation was one of the first big days with my whole family that was *all about MEEEEE* - that is, until my (now) former sister-in-law decided to show up after being asked not to come, in a truly misguided effort to “SAVE…

I’m so jealous that you have so many more David Sedarisses to go! I’ve read them all, but I just started listening to the audiobooks (he narrates them) and it’s the best part of my commute.

Oh I definitely listened to my coworkers talking about their juice cleanses while munching a breakfast burrito. Then, later, I’d make a big old sandwich so they could tell me about the apple cider vinegar shots they were pounding 4x a day. Whatever weight I gained was so worth it.

HR was married to one of the co-founders and also acted as the company’s counsel of record! I just always assumed that was not an OK thing to do, but they seemed to disagree.

Oh for sure, I’ve never known more about fad diets (and how terrible they are) than the two years I worked there. This was also a “fashion” company where the photoshopping in every model’s picture was absolutely out of control due to the founders’ deep-seated fear of legs looking fat (or, you know, legs looking like…

This looks like a lot of stuff I’d see near the kitchen in the last place I worked (ETA: workplace was about 98% women). It started with little things like a sticky note on the ice cream that said “are you sure?” but quickly escalated to the M&Ms being labeled “FAT PELLETS” with a frowny face. I won’t even delve into…