I love to shop, but I don't get any pleasure from buying cleaning supplies or towels, man. Dropping $200 at BB&B [read in Abbi's voice] will never be as fun as spending that money at Sephora.

My husband haaaaaaates when I nair my mustache when he's around. I should probably have more shame.

"Overall, not believing in God seems to make people and their offspring more tolerant. Less racist. Less sexist. Enviro-friendly."

You're the right kind of crazy, kiddo.

I read more than half of this and still didn't understand why people are mad. Can someone fill me in? I just can't read anymore while constantly asking myself "but why are people so angry?"

And you know what? Both Home Depot and Lowes have free kid's workshops where you can build something with your kid. They're awesome and, again, FREE. You can buy the kits separately, too.

Oh, I'm sorry. Are women and girls just not supposed to drink and ave a good time now? God forbid they do anything that isn't a sober, rational thought at a whopping 16 years old. Sounds like she had ONE drink, and it was drugged. Maybe we should give you a drink that is drugged and see how you react, being an adult…

1. If she did pass out from drinking, she sure couldn't consent to sex.

Troll score: 0/10