Yeah, they aren't as bad as you're assuming. 1970 was a long time ago. My experience comes out of counseling through similar organizations, and none of the materials we worked with were designed to reinforce gender stereotypes. I think the only way you'd run into that problem now is if you had a…

Amen.

My pre-marital counseling was shit too. When you don't have a program/set of evidence-based practices to follow, it usually comes down to some random person's opinions. Like anything else, before doing marital counseling do research to find one that's well-respected and not crazy. PREPARE/ENRICH is the one folks…

As I understand it, the Catholic pre-Cana is a program designed to encourage communication, develop relationship strengths, and help make sure that both partners have discussed major relationship hot spots (in-laws, money, sex, religion). And I'm guessing its a reference to the wedding at Cana, where Jesus turned…

That's a really interesting question. Like if both partners were Jez posters or whatever, and one or both was posting about how their ex mistreated them. I have no idea how to manage that. If both of them created new identities that would involve losing a lot of contacts and effort (unless they told their old…

that actually sounds pretty bad. Sorry that happened to you. Glad you're ok. Hope he doesn't have any more victims.

There are some pretty solid evidence-based pre-marital counseling curricula out there that do have proven records of improving marriage outcomes. Encouraging people to do programs like that is a good thing, which is why Texas waives the marriage license fee for anyone who takes an approved one (though their approval…

There's an ocean of difference between happening to discover that someone is trans in the process of an investigation and deciding to publish that fact in a major national outlet all while bitching about how being trans without wearing a sign identifying yourself is lying. Even if it was absolutely necessary to the…

One of the things that I do that helps, is I mention my significant other early in pretty much all of my conversations. It keeps me from being tempted in any way to feed my ego, and it keeps new relationships from getting awkward.

I think I'd find that hard to do emotionally, because I see shared child-rearing as a particularly romantic thing. Then again, I guess the point is that we would raise children who don't have that particular hangup. It would be interesting to see how that would work. Would you live with your parenting partner or your…

This is a great demonstration of why the government shouldn't be involved be privileging one type of interpersonal contract/relationship over others. Let churches issue whatever kind of certificates they want, and quit giving tax breaks/insurance claims/whatever based on who signed what type of interpersonal contract.…

It would be a cool gesture of solidarity with the victim to not user the her name on Jezebel. It wouldn't be an empty gesture either. Having fewer high traffic websites recording her sexual history would probably be a nice thing for her future, given that any potential boyfriend, employer, college etc. might google…

OMG I LOVE WATERWORLD AND I HAVE NEVER MET SOMEONE ELSE WHO SHARES THIS FEELING. But I hated the Kevin Costner Robin Hood. Why does he speak old English with an American accent? How can you say the word "doth" without at least TRYING to sound like you know what the words you are saying mean?

So the accuser, who went to the police immediately, was traumatized, alone and impaired, and subject to a hostile interview doesn't have a perfect story. And the other side, who had more than eight months to prepare, a team of lawyers, police help, the opportunity to share notes and edit, and millions of dollars at…

Wait you mean someone wants to do a remake of Varsity Blues?

Also props to ESPN (which doesn't always make good choices) for standing behind their reporter, documenting the decisions they made as a team, and the approval they received from the institution, and defending her work.

Wait, do you really think that getting into a cab with someone is the same as consent to have sex? And that engaging in oral sex means it can't be rape?

HA! There's a new church that just opened right down the street from me called XTREME HARVEST CHURCH! For serious. I've been operating under the assumption that they are turning swords into plowshares via dirtbike races or skateboard competitions.

This. Megachurches are very good at connecting people to each other, developing strong communities, and helping people grow strong friendships with members of the group. They are well-structured, well-organized, and well-run, and they have a lot to offer that progressive churches often can't offer. When you go into a…

I know the pastor at North Mason United Methodist Church, and he's amazingly progressive, and truly committed to economic and social justice, and building open and affirming communities. The congregation is open and affirming of LGBTQ folks. If you live out that way, that church would be a good place to try.