"Are you a real Barber?" - Tiki, every morning, to the Fathead on his wall.

Possibly the chain haircut places are closer/cheaper? Real barbers are harder to find? You seem especially angry about this. Are you a real barber?

I believe it is. Not that I'm complaining in most instances.

It came to mind because I had to stop by one last night, and it seemed like the whitest place on earth.

I have a dream that Whole Foods won't be so crowded today.

I'm not a Sedaris Rolodex yet, but I am intrigued by your ideas and would like to subscribe to your newsletter.

I'd say yes, but I'm slightly biased.

I can't imagine what it was like in that household growing up: both Amy and David running around.

It's nice to see the Astros are winning at something. All of my Astros-fan friends down here are getting grumpy.

And I thought Wainwrights 12 to 6 was the best curve in baseball (when it's on). That is the most insane side-to-side movement I've seen on a curve.

Eh, I was just picking the next closest team to where I grew up. It has been rather...disappointing. Everything seems like it's been downhill since Super Bowl XX.

Way to troll Leitch with the Ankiel reference!

To be fair, this team was in St. Louis during Will's childhood.

Ask someone that rooted for this team before it got moved to Arizona, and you'll get similar responses. Mr. Bidwell is not a popular man in St. Louis. Or Arizona, it would appear.

To be fair, fans of this team from their St. Louis days still feel this way. Hell, it turned me into a Bears fan, which is better than rooting for either the Cardinals or the Rams at this point.

If that's what they've done, it's a damned good strategy.

Thank you! I was getting MLB rules confused with my beer league softball rules. Y'know, because the two things are so much alike.

I am so glad I saw this review—the ads I've seen do make it seem like a straight-up slasher flick.

I've not see what the actual ruling was on that. Is it like when the ivy eats a ball at Wrigley? I think that's a dead ball and two bases, right?

I felt so bad for Jon Miller during the ESPN telecasts. I always thought Jon was a great announcer, and you could just see him shaking his head in wonder during that second or two of silence after one of Joe's dumber comments.