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Forget prenups. Thank God for non disclosure agreements! Right? Right? (Note to self: Check “NDA/Melania” folder tonight...)

I haven’t even started on Hillary and the press is already on me. Sad! The truth is the press never tells everybody that out of all the women, none of them say anything to anybody when they know me. Nobody. That’s like a ton of people and that’s why women love me.

I coulda had Carly but I passed after she got mad at me for saying her face makes me wanna hurl and she started it because of Megyn and Megyn apologized now so we’re good. So Carly is very thin skinned and so I passed on her and she’s still mad. Whatever, Carly. Nice face!

I never tell my fans to deck people. They don’t need my encouragement and it’s because I tell it like it is or something, believe me. When there are tremendous amounts of people and they get passionate about Making America Not Suck Anymore, then it’s a problem, but I never said to get violent, I just said I heard it…