Probably.

Did they put the child up for adoption in a legit way? Or did they do it on the down-low through some sketchy-ass Facebook group or some shit? The latter is all too common and as awful as you would think.

Yep, when you’re a Pope in that situation there’s no ambiguity about what’s expected of you.

TikTok Jesus

I dunno, he wasn’t saying pray for their safety, or their acquittal, or the protection of their bank accounts and careers.

Yep. Everyone else is expendable. Your duty, as an American, is to die to soothe a cop’s fear.

Two of them in my Juke?

I was going to suggest that a UVC disinfection system would be safer but realized cops would try to use that on captives as well.

The accumulated grease comes out of the driver’s seat.

Cops work at night, too. And All Cops Are Bastards.

Cops are trained to be fucked up. They’re trained to kill rather than de-escalate.

Or they can turn it on during the summer and kill the person inside faster.

Ed Gein is intrigued.

Ed Gein is intrigued.

And they won’t be sent to zoos where inbreeding would be a problem. So like if the Cincinnati zoo had some of their close cousins, these cheetahs wouldn’t be sent there.

And anal sex with a gimp.

I thought he was just talking about the movie ticket site.

This. This is it.

Carol’s a dead ringer for the monster lady from 1966's The Reptile

Dan Brown absolutely gets shit on a similar level.

“ WHO would try to return a TV they just stole to the same store where they supposedly stole it from”