Obviously you had a fever. And the only prescription was more cowbell.

As far as I know, yes, but I'm not an expert.

My boyfriend breaks into this story anytime I use the word "phone" in a sentence. We love this story/meme to no end in my house.

Oh god, me too! There was one with some house in a rural area and everything started shaking and banging and then some family members walked up to the house and there was an old truck with a bunch of blood but no one was in the truck and then it drove away...DO YOU REMEMBER THAT ONE? IT TERRIFIES ME STILL.

I wish we used Daesh instead, because Isis is ruining a bunch of nice things for us, including the goddess and this lovely dog.

The Egyptian goddess Isis is mightily pissed off about The hijacking of her name too. These Islamic fundie dickberets don't know who they are messing with. Old gods, show these guys who they're messing with. Giant beetles up every fundie's ass, you just wait and see.

You know what, though? Pepperoni Butt has way better social skills than most people on OK Cupid.

Oh okay you know some people are serious about punctuation on here it was actually way worse I threw in some periods and commas but it's so long I pretty much gave up lol

My parents have been married 34 years. My mom is a white American preacher's kid and my dad is a brown Muslim from a foreign country with a funny accent. So when my mom told her father that she was marrying my dad, he was not happy and refused to pay for the wedding. My parents were super poor so they couldn't afford…

I WANT A PICKLE NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My father is the GM of a chain restaurant that does guest surveys (the ones that print out every 10th check or so) and he had been very vocal as to how much of a sham he thinks they are. Naturally the upper management assumes that the higher the guest scores, the better business the store will do.

Here is a general rule of advice. If you ask somebody to hang out and they say they're not available:

While I don't in the least identify with these numpties, I think it's high time we took collective responsibility for what is clearly a very toxic community in many ways. Not in all ways and not all people, but that's not the point. We can all do something about this but we're just enabling the bad apples when we…

Bears, you're well known for your bitchy one-liners in the comments section. Obviously the strength of your joke will depend greatly on the content of the article and the various directions you can take it.

I hear if you spell Geraldo's full name out and then change the font to Wingdings it actually shows the plot to Big Trouble in Little China.

"Women can't properly discuss something they've never experienced."

Here's the thing (and forgive me, this is long, and please don't think it's attacking you because I'm not trying to do that—I think we want the same things but see different ways of how it realistically can happen): Women's media groups have been trying for decades to make this happen. They try to be a voice for the…

I am almost weeping reading this. Sometimes I am up to here with the "love yourself" rhetoric because Western culture is severely lacking in a dedication to community, but the advice in Polly's column is solid gold.