It’s an attack on our country in a true sense. It’s an attack on what we all stand for.

And his go-ahead goal was perfection (admittedly helped more than a little bit by a blind linesman).

“Europe League”?

“Go get ‘em, kid.”

That image was my message board signature back in the day.

And not to mention one of the best scores.

A dude with a leather flight jacket, jodhpurs, a retro space-age looking helmet, and a rocket pack, holding a broomhandle Mauser while standing majestically in front of an American flag? Fuck YES. I tear up a little just thinking about it.

I’m really worried that Trump is just going to fuck this up somehow. It feels like when my four year old son insists on carrying his plate full of food to the dinner table by himself, but instead of some pasta, the fate of the world is hanging in the balance.

The Rocketeer was one of the best superhero movies ever. Fight me.

I just read them. They’re amazing.

I’m just going to assume a whole bunch of people tweeted “Shut the fuck up, Pai” in reply. 

He must be an Eagles fan.

Derek Jeter is setting a great example for the rest of Florida by attempting to purge the Marlins of every arm they’ve got.

Why be a Kwan when you can be a Kardashian?

Listen, people, you can have a bolt-action rifle, a shotgun, or a revolver. If you can’t successfully hunt or target shoot with those, you are a shitty shot who should not have a weapon. If you cannot “defend yourself” with those, you are a shitty shot who should not have a weapon and also has likely been killed by…

Ladies and gentleman, that is the conclusion of overtime. The gold medal will now be decided by a shootout.

“And if they were as good and confident and brave as they seemed, they’d continue to dominate the Italian giants all day until clawing back a heroic 2-2 draw that would set them up perfectly for the return leg at home and would really crystalize just how incredible a transformation this club has undergone from once…

Howard has altered the tone. Pray he does not alter it further.