I had a manager once who refused to let us switch shifts with each other because, and I’m paraphrasing, “YOU DONT MAKE YOUR OWN SCHEDULE.”

“After the chef removed the grill marks from the chicken, he sharpened the blackened parts into points and stabbed them in the dad’s eyes, Your Honor.”

No shit, my story would end with "There were no survivors of what came to be called "The Pizza Cutter Massacre."

This entitled housewife looks back at her impressionable child and calmly says “She is yelling because that girl deserves it, the service is terrible every time we come here.” And then she looked me straight in the eyes.