"Any guy who would date me, knowing I'm a transsexual, is not a guy I would want to date. "

Itty-bitty duct tape

"Yes, you'll pay more up front for the phone in a few months since you're blowing your subsidized load early, but if you stick to your contract and squeeze Verizon's pipe for all it's worth, it'll pay off in the long run."

Guys, guys! Can't you see? If we keep up this arguing like this, we'll never get this product out the door! And that's just what the Communists want!

I read that as "Pizza", not "Pzizz," and was quite excited for a brief moment in time.

*cough*wilhelmscream*cough*

Man, now I'm all depressed. I was seriously hoping for a new Crimson Skies game. I loved that game so much

Funny, I'm listening to the Dexter soundtrack right now. Daniel Licht knows how to make some pleasant tunes

I was clearly exaggerating

"I don't have any problems with homosexuals or anything. I have a few gay friends, and if people are that upset about the usage of the word I apologize."

Cows don't have horns, bulls do. So don't mess with their cash bull!

Well, with *everyone* being brain damaged, Chell will fit right in!

God, I hate that show so much. The host points out every single thing they do. "We're now walking into the store, and we are now inside the store. There are people here!"

"That hacker, the one on Twitter, did you catch him?"

In the KotOR series, it's really easy for me to be the bad guy, but only because being the good buy means you're flat broke. Evil = more credits

Oh man, the girl asking the questions is gorgeous. I find her way more attractive than the booth babes, mostly because she really isn't sexed up.

Funny, pinball used to be the symbol of a rebellious bad-ass, mostly because it was illegal for a period of time. Hardly considered "kiddie crap."

I never knew he had a daughter, especially not one named Zelda. After seeing the extended version of this commercial, I believe I have fallen in love

Also, unplugging the monitor solves everything!

It's all very circular. Servers don't get paid much because they're expecting tips, and they're expecting tips because they aren't paid much. Also, because many places require servers to "tip-out," those who don't work in the front line often do get a cut of the tips, but mostly bussers and hosts, sometimes cooks.