I'd hypothesize that any high-quality bears in the Scranton area would have long ago made the move to New York or Philadelphia.

So, not a tie-in to Threat Level: Midnight?

If you're looking for a convenient list of critics whose opinions you can ignore from this point forward, I've got it right here: http://www.villagevoice.com…

(Morn walks into Quark's)
Morn: …
Everyone: Morn!
Diane: Mornan.

So what exactly is the deal with his looming retirement?  It's been described that way by a lot of people, but in an interview with New York that I read the other day, he called it a "sabbatical."

Geez, get a room, you two.

Agent Van Pelt was killed while waiting to make contact with his handler, a figure known only as G. Pumpkin.

I may be missing something, but what Criterion DVD are you talking about?

Hey, why isn't anyone else dressed up like a satyr?  Todd told us to . . . oh, fawn.  Well, this is certainly embarrassing.

My experience is that if you have to ask, the answer is "no."

Has anyone even seen Abe Vigoda since Conan released him back into the wild?

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…and Cobie Smulders and Josh Radnor can move on to . . . other things.

Imogen Poots or GTFO.

I think we're all here to make that joke.

If I learned one thing from English class, it's that you shouldn't drive around with a cat in the car or you'll get murdered by the Misfit.

Without getting permission to court them from their parents first?  You dog, you!

I get it!

Cranston has played both Buzz Aldrin and Gus Grissom.

Then they could have Billy Joel do the theme song to the spin-off, Uptown Abbey.