Good ol’ Mitt. Remember when he tried to iron his jacket while wearing it? I miss a candidate we could just laugh at, without crying.

I actually miss Mitt Romney. That is what this garbage fire of an election cycle has done to me.

At 46 it means “Do you get pizza delivery and have a glass of wine in front of the TV on Fridays?”

When I was 26, it meant “do you get drunk and then have sex with strangers?”

Sounds like a great way to waste your drugs on a couple that isn’t dtf. Take that mess over to The Cuck.

Also, I feel like Team Celebrity failing to place in this competition is like a Soviet gymnast not getting on the podium in the early 80's. Bobby, your family is about to be sent to Siberia. =(

And yet somehow this was overlooked...

God, Lea Michelle tries so hard.

Would read, then would watch the Rom-Com adaptation. The Deadspin guys taught the Jezebel women how to love, Jezebel taught Deadspin how to live... or at least how to talk to women.

Legit question: why isn’t this tweet pinned? When we are all dead and gone (after Trump has us killed), this is all that will remain of your accomplishments.

3-HIT COMBO!

What I don’t understand is people calling this “talking trash”.

“I said no pictures, asshole!”

Obsessed with these kale chips?

“That’s ok kiddo, thanks for the reminder I need to update my will.” - Jeb Bush

As Moore faces his ethics hearing, Starling is pondering a run for Governor, under the platform, “A queen you can trust.”

Well you are doubling down on racism so I guess it would make sense to dismiss you as a racist.

Why would I have a problem? Most first generation immigrants that move post-school struggle to learn the language fluently. That has always been the case in the US. It works fine. Older immigrants learn enough to get by, and the second generation becomes fluent. No reason to be shitty about it.

You are speaking the truth and the way people are attacking your comments on this article reflects their complete cluelessness about the dynamics of addiction and recovery. Just wanted to say that.

Pretty sure that jaguar was shot weeks ago. Still a damn shame of course. Also, I would add USA women’s gymnastics owning the qualifying, and the men’s 4x100 freestyle relay win by the US. It was awesome!