My husband was rage-texting me about something stupid last night and all I could think of was how nice it would be to be able to rage text back instead of my non-emotional, non-escalating “ok”.  I feel this article! 

Hang on, you drink diet coke at the gym??? HOW! 

I really wish people would take the “A-word” out of the discussion and phrase it as a medical issue: do you really want the government to have the ability to prosecute you based on safe medical care you can choose to receive from your licensed doctor?

Now, I totally get these guys are reality TV stars and have bills to pay too, and that Rachel needs a new way to earn money if she’s not working on Vanderpump Rules, but SURELY there’s a better occupation for her out there than podcasting her affair??? 

My dad gets into the Liberal conspiracy theories and gets his proverbial knickers WAY in a twist from left-leaning news sites. I’m starting to wonder if it’s a sign of dementia... I’m not Trump fan, but I don’t spend hours and hours reading dumb articles and wishing ill on the guy.

It amazes me that Cardi B is always the adult in the room. Thanks for the life advice, Cardi! 

YES! I’m looking forward to some snarky takedowns on the elf. My child is too young for the elf and I’m racking my head for other threats I can use for good behavior vs. a tattling creepy elf. 

I just spent my last two hours walking around a chemical plant talking to the 99.9% male workforce about Christmas. They’re not super excited about either - expensive and too much family engagement since everyone has lived in this area since time began. But at least it’s a paid day off! 

Take a breath, this is Dirt Bag, not a scientific journal. We need some silliness in our dark world. 

I've never been to Salem but it blows my mind there's a tourist industry based on horrific accusations and horrible deaths. Museums seem great but witchy tourist shops... yikes! 

Me too. The world is so dark right now I need a little silly celebrity gossip to make me feel like an educated person without feeling so hopeless : /

I agree! Ive had a few major life events that absolutely shocked me to my core to where I'll never be "young" again either. Great thoughts!

I feel this way too - I’ve definitely had business trips where I stayed a day or two longer to adventure. I bet this is really standard.

EXACTLY. This is about having good, safe working conditions, regardless of how you feel about dating shows. 

I’m embarrassed how much I’m into Vanderpump Rules saga... all of these people are complete trash! The show is about a friend group who all dated and cheated on each other! I’ve been cheated on before, and I can’t imagine how awful it would to have photographers in my driveway... but here I am : / 

I had no idea I would be in pain AFTER I gave birth... I figured it would be fuzzy slippers and I’d be running around like normal maybe a day or two afterwards. I remember a week of extreme cramping, pain, and weakness... and anger that my partner could go to the store whenever he wanted and I could barely get out of…

But those people are also constitutionally garunteed a jury of their peers , not being shot by a high schooler

And she’s got nails on! And her hair looks great! And she might be wearing fake eyelashes (I can’t tell)

I probably will until the signs requiring masks when entering stores come down... I may be the only one in the store wearing one, but I feel like I’m showing some compassion to the clerk who is stuck wearing one. I see it the same way as having to wear shoes and a shirt - I may be more comfortable without shoes, but…

This is going to get buried, but that’s okay... I’m 9 weeks pregnant, and the emotional highs and lows are just brutal. I’m off anti-depressants and other vices used to numb feelings, and I’m in total panic that my entire life as I know it is over... I’m an athlete and my typical workouts are getting harder and…