Yeah but my house has one major advantage over Kylie Jenner's: no Kardashians or Jenners live in my house.

theoretically, i don't either, but that doesn't stop me from imagining all the wonderful ways they could be punished.

Can't wait to hear how this one will be explained. Skirt too short? Shouldn't have been out alone? I've had it with this planet for today.

Poor sad whale :(

Tina Fey (via Matt Lauer) really nailed this one:
"I'm always amazed at what women will do because they're afraid of being rude,"

How thoughtful of her to leave some juice.

But seriously, which one looks better?

THIS MY LITERAL NIGHTMARE. Groooossss

I'm sure the ugly stepsisters have big old unlovable waists.

IT IS REALLY NOT COOL TO GET SPIKE INVOLVED IN THIS MESS, KARA.

I wish there were plus-size Cinderella clothes. It's so easy to find tough femme plus-size clothes and that's great but like...shape-flattering be damned I want to look like a goddamn meringue and I'm a grown ass woman and I'm a size 22.

Great, now I have to re-read the article...

That wasn't casual racism. It was casual stupidity.

i pictured all of these meals as happening at Fawlty Towers.

Jareth?

I just came up with a whole story about interns sent out to buy a ball gag on the SNL corporate card, and knowing that those nerds wouldn't know how much a ball gag actually costs, went ahead and purchased 8 dildos for themselves and all their friends, and let Lorne Michaels pick up the tab.

There was a couple in bondage gear with a ball gag during the monologue.

Maybe this says something about me, but I just collapsed in a ball laughing after watching that sketch

Reminds me of Saartjie Baartman a bit - women of colour's bodies treated as curios and exoticised/fetishised rather than as standards of beauty.