DAMN IT IM CRYING ON THE TRAIN AND A GUY IS STARING AT ME AND I JUST WHISPERED ‘Alan rickman...’.

The best thing about Howard Stern is his amazing and selfless wife Beth. Her Instagram is nonstop rescue cat adorableness.

As a resident of a state where heroin has been a problem (southwest Michigan) it's people cutting it with veterinary drugs that make it real sketchy. The same drug that puts a horse down is not the same thing that humans should do....

Is Mandy Moore’s new boo the singer of Dawes, because he and i had some eye bang situations three years ago NYE in San Francisco, and Mandy girl, I can tell you, if the eye sexin’ is good, the rest is bound to follow through.

Agreed! All pies bow down to key lime!

Hellooooo Jezzies! Xmas has been throughly uneventful for me, spent most of it binge watching Once Upon A Time (how had I never seen this?!) and looking at healthcare plans (gotta love the bar business, all cash, zero benefits), since I recently went to PP and came out with zero bacteria in my urine test and a clean…

Roomie and I just ate 60 bucks of Mediterranean food and watched die hard! However now I am in the bath, even after a round of Bactrim and a round of Cipro, still having ‘feels like a uti but isn’t a uti’ symptoms. Totally clean bill of health, no reason to feel like this. The Internet tells me I might have…

I am here because I have had a few manhattans, and I echo your statement!

Good. That's what they get for going to Sea World.

BB-8 was my favorite character in the force awakens. There was a discussion of ‘Oscar Isaac as a husband or BB-8 for a companion’ amongst friends after the movie.

Sadly no, little jerk me would always spit my retainer out the second I could, so I have one crooked bottom tooth.

I had braces/spacers/retainers/headgear/he whole nine yards for 7 years, and my mom told me that if I didn’t wear my headgear at night (literally, it’s a bridle for humans), that my orthodontist would know because there was a chip in it, and he would pull a tooth out for every night I didn’t wear it.

Let's not, and say we didn't. Because why, why is this a thing. I hope her album has that god awful creepy Jesus on the cover.

As an avid snorkeler and diver, this pleases me very very much. Way to cooperate on something for once, congress. Our children and our children’s children (now mine, I will never spawn, but all y’alls children) deserve to see beautiful lakes and oceans.

Look! My cat who was feral two weeks ago knows the difference between right and wrong(bath and not bath), can she have a vote?

Wow, that must be nice. I am a 28 year old who had company paid insurance when I got my abortion. Five months later, I got a bill not only for the abortion itself, but for the mirena I was promised was covered under my insurance.

Christ on a bike I have not had enough ambien to comprehend Chris Brown making any statement on how the police should handle anything. I do realize a blatant police brutality case is vastly different from a blatant domestic violence case, but step off your imaginary pedestal, bro. Or I will punch you off it. And I'm…

House of Yes is my thanksgiving tradition!

Same. The inside llewyn Davis soundtrack is my bathtub music of choice. That voice, that bod, that face hnnnngggg.

Carrie Fisher seems to have left her most important accessory at home... Gary! More Gary please!