First!

In our hour of greatest need, let us turn on the Manimal signal.

But you’ll miss the stinger of Martian Manhunter waiting by the phone.

Braun Strowman’s only weaknesses are 4-wheeled vehicles

Personal fave: The “That was murder” chants after Strowman was “crushed” by the garbage truck.

When Angle’s music played and he returned to the match, it could’ve just as easily been the intended setup for a Roman Reigns comeback.

I still think the strangest thing of the night was the garbage truck guy (maybe a freshly shaven Duke the Dumpster Droese?) who just chilled at the back of the truck the entire time nonchalantly watching the grown men beat each other.

I’d like to turn the Paige on that era.

“That was murder” chant was real spot on after Strowman was thrown into the garbage truck.

This definitely wasn’t a “good” show but pretending (?) to murder a giant-among-giants with a garbage truck followed by the good people of Minneapolis chanting “U-S-A!” while a former Olympic Gold Medalist impersonates a simultaneously super popular and super hated guy to pull on a super-over act from like 4 years ago…

“A.J. Styles is the best wrestler in the world”

It was especially a shock to those of us who thought Kurt Angle had been dead for the last several years.

I went to bed more sports-entertained after a ppv than I have in a while. I crawled into bed and the wife asked “how was it?” and I said “really dumb but really fun” and she said “i’m glad you finally had fun watching one of those things.”

Unless we’re talking about celebrating our Independence Day, I don’t want to hear any inspirational speeches!

You’ve heard of ‘Broken Window Theory’? Now, Rick and Co. just have to wait for the neighborhood to go to shit.

Negan’s difficult to hit because he’s always bobbing up and down and leaning to one side.

This week, my girlfriend and I learned that her Uncle Nim-Karrak has a serious power addiction problem. Apparently, this has been going on for years while she’s been out pirating the Black Coast and I’ve been tending her ship’s library, but the situation became dire recently when he overthrew my girlfriend’s father…

I have a friend the just committed to a 6 month stint in Puerto Rico with the ACoE. Things are happening.

Am I wrong, child? What concern did you show for Puerto Rico as it built up debt for decades? What concern did you show when the country lost almost 10% of its population following the 2008 financial crisis? What concern did you show as the island’s infrastructure crumbled? Oh, you did not care because “Big Bang…

Um... I make $40,000 per year and have two kids, one of which is in college. What the fuck am I supposed to do, dipshit? There’s something called “the American government” whose sole reason for existing—get this— is to make sure the citizens residing under its sovereignty don’t die from unnecessary causes. Like, if a…