The baby thing is definitely starting to stink. It’s about time for a change.

ok I laughed

That was a good save, but ugh to all of that.

Has he announced how he plans to “make” Mexico build the wall? Or does he have a magic mind control device? I mean, that would make me feel better about his popularity.

Ok, I don’t watch the show, but should I? And what sort of drugs pair well with the viewing?

I did not know this was a thing, but I fully approve.

I opted to drive instead of metro expecting the trains to be worse. Might have been a good call!

or if she’s not interested

that would be my exact face

I propose we rename the phrase to “playing the colbert card”, because one is certainly outdoing the other.

So I was expecting armageddon trying to get to work today in DC, but it turned out to be a breeze. Chill pope made the traffic BETTER in DC, which clearly counts towards one of his miracles for sainthood.

I feel like normally it’s his rings, but chill pope is a different pope.

I pronounce it Croch-y and have no regrets.

It really must be sad and lonely to be too good for every man on earth.

I tried watching his show but couldn’t even make it through the first episode.

I’d watch the shit out of that movie.

She should realize by now that her party’s slogan is “if we can’t have it our way, then no one can have it any way”

There are way more movies in that list I’d watch than I care to admit.

I agree with Mess. Your accent is adorable and wonderful.