“If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant’s life, she will choose to save the infant’s life without even considering if there are men on base.” -Dave Barry

fixed

You can always make another baby, but there’s only one foul ball.

Maybe she didn’t see that he wound up with the ball?

Well, you’ll never be my latex salesman.

“In some ways, Trump is one of the best things to happen to this country because look at how many people are getting off their posteriors,” says Sherry Wells, the Green Party’s Michigan chairwoman. “So part of me is giggling.”

Looking forward to this comment section.

I always imagined Jared sounding like Gilbert Gottfried.

Thank god they’ve got excellent health care!

My 13 year old daughter does special fx! She’s attending a camp for it next week and I’m really excited. She’s self-taught so far so it’ll be interesting to see how/if she changes technique with instruction. Here’s her latest:

When was the last time the children of our president were off limits? I’m CLEARLY not advocating being horrible to a child, but the obama girls were called monkeys for 8 years, and im pretty sure Chelsea was CRUCIFIED for existing. So you’ll have to excuse me for not caring that this post, and most of the…

Barron looks tall for his age. I hope Melania is miserable and they place poor Barron in a boarding school. The less he has to do with his family, the better.

God I hope this is an actual screenshot

Kind of sad about only one hoeing up, though.

It was treatment like this that led Karl and his brother to join Hans Gruber and the Volksfrei. So unnecessary.

It’s OK, you guys. The WaPo comment section assures me that this is FAKE NEWS.

I also asked her to describe Trump in three words and her response was: “Stupid asshole”

ugh, this place has really humped the shark

Hi neighbor :) I’m in Hyde Park, not too far from the park. I’m black. Swing by my place with that dark rum and I’ll escort you to Washington. I’ll blend in and you can pretend to be my white friend.