They can be very clever...

I had a legit coffee-spit because of this. So good.

My prediction of her ten best “blog” entries on Facebook:

+1 old guitar and an empty bottle of booze.

This woman makes a compelling case that Mexico won the Texas Revolution.

No, it’s Niven’s Law: “There is no cause so right that one cannot find a fool following it,” and its corollary (summarized ‘cause I can’t find it with proper attribution): No matter what your cause is, the media will interview the biggest idiot supporting it on TV.

Very Cosmopolitan

A handy TL;DR version of what is my new favorite top ten list of all time:

Did this lady move to Houston from Miami?

Burneko’s mom is awesome.

One of the saddest moments on any nature documentary is when the gazelle can finally rest in one of the rare available chairs on the Serengeti and then some lion pushes him over.

Nicknames for Magary, ranked:

“As I would push him over in his chair immediately to assert my dominance and supremacy like a lion does in the wild.”

“Hey Susan, gotchyer Facebook link. Yew oughtta trah getting some ‘a yer funny writin’ published, send it awn in ta Reader’s Dahgest ‘er suntin’ lahk ‘at.

DREW MAGHAZI!!!11!1!!

In Drew’s defense, he got a 2140 on his retake of the SATs.

I attended Colby Cheese College and all I got was this delicious diploma!

Boy, you really pissed off JJ Watt.

That hurt my brain and that email is DEFINITELY being used in the 2016 edition of Why Your Team Sucks: Houston Texans

Lather, rinse, repeat.