Wings fan chucked the damn thing onto the ice in the third period, for no clear reason.

Honest question, where do you hide a huge octopus like that for 3 periods before you throw it on the ice?

Hoooo Boy, Goose Gossage’s take is going to be monumental.

I’m taking a medical aesthetics course and my teacher (who has no actual science degree) is an anti-vaxxer

“Well, this is a bit embarrassing, Your Honor. Perhaps this man has lied about his credentials. Uh, fortunately, I am familiar with a little bit of pigeon. Perhaps I can get through to it in some way.”

You should become more familiar with bird law

It also has an infinitely higher proportion of left-leaning players and even a number of left-leaning owners. Like, that’s a thimble versus the bathtub that is ‘will this make or cost us money’, but it’s not nothing.

I have a harder time explaining Michael Jordan’s moves as owner Charlotte to my 7 year old than I do explaining homosexuality. He understands that it’s okay that a guy can be in love with a guy, he has no idea why Jordan chose Marvin Williams over Chris Paul and neither do I for that matter.

Welcome to Super Bowl LIV coming to you live from the Goatse Dome.

I feel so weird when the NFL does something right for a change.

Ironic when you consider that the Falcons new stadium is basically a giant anus that looks like it’s ready for a nice big penis when the roof “opens”.

Ciara will be interested to see if he can pump fake more than once before throwing.

BRAVO!

15 years ago my friends pranked me really hard that I won the DC shoes monthly giveaway by calling my house and acting like they were from DC. I was suckered really good and got laughed at for weeks. So I wrote DC an email telling them about this story and how I should win it for real and punk those guys right back. I…

“Now let’s take a look at that from the body cam!”