But it is already being policed, which is why some people take issue with straight actors playing queer characters especially what with the current status quo.

Would he be willing to be dragged along if you/his partner had all the planning for it ready? It’s a lot of work for you, but if it wouldn’t lead to him digging his heels in even more because he’d feel you’re overstepping (for good reason!) or something, then it sounds very necessary in order to avoid inevitable…