Have you heard the one about the time a man went to a funeral and a political rally broke out?

Ok, then Warren Spahn and Bob Feller (I do see your point though)

It just sucks how everything today reminds you of Muhammad Ali, even a random pitcher for the Oakland A’s.

Leave it to Deadspin to report an incident where he was the victim of verbal locker room abuse instead of the crime he was committing that actually got himself shot and killed. Gawker media lol.

Me

You can pry my CW shows out of my cold, dead hands. With their inclusion next season of Supergirl, pretty much gonna be perfect forever.

Not the first time some old dude got overly excited about a teenage girl’s jugs.

Joke’s on you, Tom. This was quite obviously an actual tryout for the Nets.

Cat person!! Run away!!!

Yeah, my German Shepherd fears people. Call me when you get a picture of that.

Counter-counter-counterpoint: Dogs love being yelled at so they put up with people’s shit to give us hope and then they eat my god damn remote again and get what they want.

Reverse-sidepoint: dogs just want to eat, and hugs don’t typically involve food.

Counter-counter-counterpoint: Dogs love treats so they will put up with all the shit to get one.

My dog hates to be hugged. Tries to wriggle out of it. I hug her anyway because I like to annoy her. I don’t hug the cat - her claws are teeth are too sharp.

UFC so aggressively reports alleged copyright violators on Twitter that they reported themselves.

Gambling doesn’t ruin anything, it makes it more exciting. What’s more thrilling than knowing you might lose a finger or a hand if you lose a match!

NOW it’s a sport ;)

I don't want to live on this planet rock anymore.

that’s Caravaggio honey

I know. It’s about my next door neighbor.