When I’m buying beer, local means “have I ridden my bicycle to the brewery from my house”, domestic means “from my state” and everything else is an import.

Have you tried Izze grapefruit soda? It’s hard to go back to drinking Squirt after trying it a couple of times. It also makes a wonderful N/A mimosa with some OJ, if you give Dryuary a go next time it comes around. I’ll have to give the Jarritos grapefruit a try to see how it compares.

Not only is it a reasonable thing to do, but it’s not even always more expensive! I eat a lot of riced cauliflower, and it’s (somehow) almost cheaper to buy the frozen bagged stuff than it is to buy heads of fresh cauliflower—to say nothing of the time and prep involved.

And Rosebud is a sled.

“...I liked the idea of just buckets of wet Italian beef...” 
My word, I’m all hot and bothered now.

Best line I saw: Daniel Jones looks like the actor they’d cast to play Eli in a movie about Peyton’s life.

Can we get Drew Magary to try your recipe? 

So rich people can’t also be folksy? I don’t know how much deception there is. Just seeing her home on Food Network makes it clear that the woman is well off. She might be a really nice person, and the folksy personality might not be an act. Genuinely nice wealthy people do exist. 

Only one letter separates writer and waiter, after all, and the salaries are about the same.

I’m probably extremely online. I can enjoy a chicken sandwich, support gay marriage, and oppose people foisting their religious beliefs on others all at the same time.

This is all fine generally, but I would point out that almost every company is going to end up passing profits to someone that is going to support causes that you’re really not going to like. The Cathys might be a little more direct. 

We’ve got bullshit like Whoppers and Cadbury Egg but nobody grabbed Take 5?!? That would be my first round pick. Whatchamacallit would be a backup pick if Take 5 was off the board. Both of them tap into the sneaky good combo of peanut butter and caramel. Snickers is the only one picked here that comes close.

Yeah, either this or they have to watch the replay at normal speed. It should be blatantly obvious that a call needs to be reversed and if it isn’t, then just get on with the game. 

i think the best way to do replay is to institute a 30-second cap. if you can’t figure it out in the window then the call stands. you can fix the total fuck ups without it turning into what we saw last night

too soon

What if I mix the SSB with alcohol? Surely this is a two wrongs make a right situation!

I suspect if you were looking to increase your chances of finding the worst people, the Taco Bell drive thru at 1:40 am is a pretty good place to start.

We’ll see who makes more honey!

“BEADS.”

You will get nearly as many votes as there are books (nearly, because there are a few generally recognized duds). "Going Postal" is my sentimental favorite, because it's the second one I read, and it is REALLY funny.