Someone sends you grainy cell phone video of someone raping/having sex with a clearly underage girl, claiming it’s Trump. You can’t make out the face, but it looks like it’s probably him and sounds like him.

So, he’s basically got the same personality/mental defects as a certain candidate for President?

HOW do you do this?!?!

That was the most important part.

It was ‘sarcasm’.

I’m pretty sure we haven’t seen peak asshole yet. The racists were activated by Obama in a way we haven’t seen in ages. Trump spent the primaries tapping into that, which certainly helped him with Cruz and Rubio.

Well, in your defense, this answers the age old question.

All the stars for ‘it was the cat’s ass’

Huh. Not pumpkins, huh?

Dead squirrel = squirrel meat, plus some fur, bone and connective tissue.

The worst thing is that this kid is named Brylan.

I don’t use the term lightly, but I do use the word to put it in terms trump would understand.

Yup, but people are the biggest carbon generators around. If we could cull 20% of the world’s population, with a special focus on under 18 year olds, we could really cut emissions.

Mmmm... I’ll take a dry aged strip with a side of methane-filled flatulence.

Shorter: because MORE COWS

I think we can all agree Donald Trump is retarded.

Awwww! It’s just twiggy! He’s a good boy. Such a snuggly little guy.

Do you wash your arms? Back? Belly? If yes to all those, why wouldn’t you wash your legs? Same argument could be applied to any of those parts as to the legs.

Taxpayers getting soaked to pay for stadiums for the rich?

This is an old scam. Surprised they don’t do it already.