Osaka who?

they can’t make the Indians give him back, that would be offensive

You are a better man than me if you’ve never just eaten cold cuts straight from the bag.

This Anne person sounds like she has an eating disorder and a drinking problem

Damn, I miss my mom. Doesn’t matter how old you get- in every man there is a little boy that needs his mother.

Vince McMahon in a nutshell.

“It’s not my job to do that!” may have worked at Penn State, but this is the NFL, Bill.

Ninety percent of Belichick’s success is just showing up against guys like this, because the league is full of them.

“It’s not my job to do that,” O’Brien said...Except, yes. It 100 percent is. Any coach in this league worth his salt knows this, and calls that timeout. It is a situation that crops up pretty frequently—there’s a reason the Patriots were hustling to get the next play off...

“Smart move. You can cash in those unused timeouts at the end of the season for boxes of Krispy Kreme donuts.” - Andy Reid

All things are lost in Bill O’Brien’s chin divot.

Peterman’s performances are some of the worst I’ve ever seen sport be damned.  He overthrew the receiver (which ironically is Kelvin Benjamin - HA!) by 10 yards. Oh and the pass was about 3 yards behind him (how’s that for accuracy Kelvin). 

The highlight reel should only show the cursing done after the player has been assessed one or two violations. What’s rare, even for emotional, aggressive, half-mental men and women in tennis is for those players to continue to push the umpire when they know they’re going to lose a point or game.

Nick Saban on the birth of his daughter:

I have to say that I truly appreciate the Raiders stepping right into the Cleveland Browns role right as the Browns seem to be thinking about becoming a professional franchise. And hey, if the Browns decide that whole winning thing still isn’t their cup of tea, the only thing better than one league doormat is two.

“What’s the right way to pronounce this?”- An adult named Billy

Somebody should make an album cover with Donda West face superimposed on the game Operation...and then hand it out in Chicago on the front steps of the charity he let run into the ground

“Little known fact, a used cigarette butt retains a whole mess of nicotine. Scrounge up a few of those out in the parking lot before the game, and bingo, you’ve taken care of your fix and saved a few bucks at the same time.”

I’ve had a pasta pass the last three years, and as a single, young guy: it is life-changing!

When is she going on the Today Show to whitesplain all of this?