Have I got the post for you

Ya whatever, Paul. You’re a 24-or-32-year-old who rewrites WaPo articles for a conglomerate-owned blog so that your readers might accidentally click on one of the 5 sponcon articles about which is the best fucking dildo to buy. Oh, but you bring signature snark that adds a real Univision flair to that AP report? Give…

you do realize that criminals would just import them illegally and still use them to commit crimes right? its not even hard to make a rudimentary gun, metal pipe, explosive of some kind, match, and any thing that fits in said metal pipe. ever seen a potato gun? same concept. or the semi-automatic crossbow that was…

Very surprised at the outcome, since Bryan struck me as someone whose wife hadn’t fucked him for a long time.

I, for one, am eager for his take on Where’s Waldo? — Where’s Melania?:

Emmitt Smith: So that’s why they call it an “oldbitchuary.”

Owen Sharts has an impressive spray chart, isn’t afraid to get his uniform dirty, and rarely just whiffs at the plate.

What do the Cavs and your comment have in common?

Perkins was trying to move out of the way as fast as he could.

When Trump heard about asylum he was furious and wanted to know why we even let crazy people into the country in the first place.

“In an altered paranoid state, believing ordinary citizens were government officials that were tracking him and recording him.”

I could see how this would be difficult for someone so used to going...
*Puts on shades*
unnoticed.

The fact that the victim stuck around after all that is amazing. I’ll take any excuse to quit a workout and go home.

he took one for the thiem

I’m glad he got his license and moved on with his life.

I have nothing but great memories working here and covering four World Series, three Super Bowls, three NBA championship runs, a Stanley Cup and two U.S. Opens.

This is just a very cruel, convoluted long-con scheme cooked up by the hockey gods so that even if the Caps get to the Stanley Cup finals, they can still, somehow, mathematically, get beat by a Penguin.

I don’t know, those guys look like pussies

A good band photo should be a mix of dudes looking cool/tough along with one being indifferent/bored. I give you:

Head of ICE former Sheriff David Clarke?

I prefer Chanel No. 1.