If I had been her teacher, I would have gone to the judges, discreetly explained the emergency, and asked for a short delay, then gone round looking for a spare maxipad and a costume to borrow. Jesus. This wasn’t make-or-break Broadway. These were fifth graders, for pity’s sake. These things happen.

Oh heck, why didn’t your teacher help you? I am mad at them and just want to hug 10 year old you.

omg, that is just horrible, and I am horrible for laughing at it.

I had been dating this guy for a few months, and after a relative’s funeral, I met him for drinks (beer and wings). We went back to my place, eventually went to sleep, and I woke up in the middle of the night and was immediately violently ill. No time to even turn my head. I threw up chicken wings and beer all over…

Parent of the year! I would not have been able to keep it together.

It’s not a great story but one of my earliest memories was going to the library with my mom and seeing a man pooping in an alley. I told my mom because I was at the tattle telling asshole age and she said “Well that happens sometimes.” and we just kept walking.