This is absurd.

Consistent with their name, they’re now offering a donation option for the Flat Earth Society.

People always forget that MJ was 1-9 before the Bulls drafted Scottie Pippen, then they say the ‘96 Bulls was one of the all time great teams, then they give Lebron shit for only being able to carry 4 minus players to the finals. I don’t get it.

Am I the only one that has stopped using a microwave at all? I actually bought a toaster oven to handle small tasks.

How many other people saw Robocop at an inappropriately young age? I think I was 10 when I saw it and in the theater no less. A lot of my friends saw it too. It probably didn’t help that the movie was somewhat marketed to kids with all the toys and cartoons

Without fire (which is older than our particular species, as a hominid thing), we wouldn’t be able to keep warm as well, or cook food. Utterly essential to the existence of man.

Furthermore, there are no groups of people that avoid/do not have fire. There was at least one major civilization (the Tawantisuyu/Inca) who…

Umm, what the hell does he have to apologize for? I’m pretty sure this is the best any NFL player has ever reacted (on video) to a violent situation. They should show this at the Rookie Symposium in the “right way” category. By attempting to stop or break this up he would have put himself in a much worse situation. Is…

Oh, good. For a minute I was concerned that Dante Fowler’s employers wouldn’t get involved.

Didn’t Gawker fire A Dog a while back?

Those are all animals that Ted Cruz eats in his natural environment, a planet of slimy, blob-faced, amphibious cave dwellers who consume their prey whole and then regurgitate the bones.

This was a squirrely move by Ted, who’s been lion to the American people. You can’t monkey with a man’s career, it will never bear fruit.

“Pack your things and get out, you son of a bitch!”

Even worse than firing, he goat-fired him!

Note: The first published version of this article mistakenly referred to Friday’s election as “tomorrow.” Because until just this moment, I thought today was Thursday. It’s only Tuesday. Fuck.

“tax on money that has already been taxed.” So...like, sales tax, gas tax, etc,etc,etc?

“I shouldn’t have to see the pain, struggle, and despair of homeless people to and from my way to work every day.”

If the police decide, for whatever reason, not to move on the case, a victim can have recourse through the university. For example, many rape cases filed with the state don’t even result in charges being filed, and there are many reasons for that. Universities can have different standards of evidence, which might…

I’ll be honest, that doesn’t cost anywhere near what I would have thought nor would it take anywhere near as long as I imagined. It’s still an unworkable mess and maintenance would be an annual nightmare, but (assuming these Civil Engineers are accurate) building it isn’t as much of a financial hit as I thought. We’ve…

It probably won't keep the kaiju out either. They just crash right through.

But how much for the “beautiful door”?