Then no one was telling you to go fuck yourself. That statement did not apply to you.

So then you DON’T believe she should have had her life ruined? Because that’s the statement you’re responding to.

There’s solid research on the crazymaking effects of weed on people who have an underlying psychiatric disorder (also lots of terrifying anecdotes: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/06/27/rud…) but I will say that a whole carful of violent stoners sounds like a sort of rare event.

Jane Pauley has twins named Ross & Rachel, which is a fact I repeat whenever given the opportunity.

Well, gosh. That’s about the nicest sort of bride you could ever hope to find/be. Three cheers for thoughtful brides. (and good sisters.)

YES! “You’ve just proposed yourself into a corner.” Classic.

Wow, what a wenus.

Wait—he didn't give you free downloads of his songs while you were dating?

Because the timing of their planning meant that she was deliberately blocked from attending her own father’s wedding.

Also because snarking about the poor bride makes her seem like an unreliable narrator—so we’re less inclined to believe her version of “older sister was desperate to get married first” rather than simply “older sister wanted a smaller wedding, just wanted to get it over with and be married.”

I don’t agree that it’s worse overall, but I think that the element of unwilling-fiancée brings its own special awfulness.

Yep, I believe it happened with Martin Lawrence and Tisha Campbell on the last season of Martin. But she had taken him to court for sexual harassment and other awful stuff, so their issues went beyond just basic not-getting-along.

she does very little TV, though.

ooooh, this is a good guess.

It’s likely because although Tom Hanks is as big a star as the others, he’s a different type. His thing has never been “sexy;” he doesn’t really do love scenes. He’s Dad, so everybody’s OK seeing him married to Mom.

Is there any chance in the world that her parents didn’t fund this venture?

Was going to say the same thing. NEVER, EVER, EVER has this happened to me. There’s no reason for it. Thinking about that horrifies me.

You can move into the space next to my car rental agency, which offers four sizes of vehicles: hybrid, Toyota, diesel, and red.

My parents have a very weird rule about eating fries with a fork if they’re very thin fries. Standard-thickness fries can be eaten with fingers. I have no idea if this is some kind of folie á deux that developed after they married or if they happened to meet and fall in love with the only other person in the world…

Are you talking about trying to prevent a mustache made of powdered sugar forming above your lip, or trying to prevent getting powdered sugar IN your existing whisker-based mustache? If the latter, I can somewhat understand this. If the former, this is crazy. Just wipe your mouth after.