Tony has no room to talk after all the slurs he’s directed at police officers.

In the NBA, that’d be two points.

Something about the officials’/NFL’s response reminds me of a shock jock DJ who admonishes a nutty caller with “Oh come on, you’ve gone too far” while subliminally whispering “keep going, keep going.”

fixed the team statement for you guys...

Start: Going for a big walk on Sundays instead of tracking your fantasy team.

Tebow: It’s always been my dream to play in the major leagues. What do you think?

I’ll take anything I can get. Fuck José Mourhino, that classless fuck.

So you want professional sports players to take flags onto the field and burn them during the anthem?

[scribble notes furiously]

Since there’s more than one championship game, they decided to call it the National League Championship Series, or NLCS for short.

Can’t

If you think that’s cool you should see the newspaper throw tricks David Carr does at 3 AM every day. Legend.

I like how all these dipshits like to point out that chicago has toughest gun laws in the country. Actually, they don’t anymore, because of the dickhead Supreme Court deciding that local governments don’t have the right to govern themselves. I mean — I sort of thought these dipshits thought that local governments are…

I’m always amazed at how much I’ve learned about my fellow black Americans by listening to white people. Apparently they all majored in African American Studies.

Isn’t it interesting how white people who don’t even live in Chicago are all somehow the experts on the violence in Chicago’s minority communities?

U.S. Soccer is a bunch of hypocrites considering Tim Howard has been blurting out inappropriate things his entire career.

Thankfully for the citizens of L.A., the police will honor his final season by missing with every shot.

Don’t you remember, he was a “distraction” while on the team. Can’t have that mucking things up, nope, nope, nope. *wanking motion*

If this is the kind of comment we’re inheriting from the orphaned Gawker crowd, I’m gonna hate you people.

Well, being able to get over the yips is part of what determines if you’ll make it as a professional athlete or not. Everyone’s gotta deal with the pressure. It’s part of the job description.