I find the unrelenting passage of time to be alarming as well so I’m going to have to side with the police on this one.

So, in short, Yelp has become the internet equivalent of a protection racket.

Yayyyy my tip!

Nothing gets me in the mood like Red Bull, especially if there’s only one can so I have to share it with my date.

Maybe De Blasio should pay more attention to New York’s growing homeless population than to a bunch of naked ladies in Hell on Earth (I mean Times Square).

its all about where you went to school and money, well always money

I’m an immigrant who came through the legal way and I perfectly fine with this. The immigration process in the U.S. Is a bizarre Byzantine maze of confusion and arbitrary decisions. Plus, people get married for worse reasons all the time. And anyone who can afford $50k is probably the type of well educated…

Is there a service like this for Americans wanting to leave America? Asking for a friend....

I think a lot of it depends on how long you are married before you apply for immigrant status. My wife is English and got her Green Card through marriage to me. We’d been married for five years before we applied and had joint mortgage and other documents to support our status.

There’s a reason why I didn’t crop that out, and the reason is that it’s my fucking favorite headline ever

No one did clinical trials on people taking showers every day.

Man, I see in fight club the strongest and smartest babies who’ve ever lived. I see all this potential, and I see squandering. God damn it, an entire generation passing gas, waiting for naps; slaves with white diapers. Mommy has us chasing toys and laser pointers, eating pablum we hate so we can make shit for our…

Maybe Jergens can do a matching scholarship.

I think a lot of adult conversations are the same ones we had as fourth-graders, just longer and more nuanced.

Can you imagine the nuclear-level shitfit some conservatives would have if a liberal clerk refused to issue someone a gun licence because they didn’t like firearms? They’d be furious, and you know, rightly so. People have a right to expect public officials to follow the law, even if they don’t agree with it. If you…

Get the fuck away from me with your “Georgia”.

This is childish, mean-spirited, and awesome.

So it’s worse than beating your wife, but not as bad as beating your wife but being caught on tape.

I would bet that this article will spur some sort of organization in NYC — the language barrier and the racial divisions seem ENORMOUS here, and the fact that these women are largely undocumented; but I bet there are legal advocates who will mobilize, there’ll be some sort of action, I hope. I would guess a union is a…

Or that we require the enforcement of labor laws so people are paid just wages. Tipping is a hugely problematic system that does not improve worker treatment. Every evaluation of tipping indicates it’s racist and sexist as hell for workers and encourages racist and sexist treatment of customers.