IIRC, he did specifically mention that he failed in the end because he was Envy.

I am 38. I was diagnosed with OCD at 5. I started medication at ten when it was approved by the FDA, after I experienced my first depressive episode. I first became truly suicial at 12. My first serious attempt was at 15 (thankfully the Internet couldn’t tell me how to succeed yet. I spent the 13 years suicidal a…