I've got this awesome hippie Wiccan facebook friend, and she posted a link to an article about vaginal steaming the other day, and no lie, Facebook's top "suggested link" underneath my friend's post was a link to a food.com recipe for steamed clams.

The cops found her with at least three times the legal level of melanin in her system.

These columns give me the angries. When is "Most Memorably Flammable Restaurant Customers" happening?

OH MY GOD THE DOLLAR STACK!! Sadly this is more common than you would think. I've encountered it several times over the years. But only once was I actually able to do anything about it.

Imagine if they wanted their coleslaw freshly squeezed.

I would watch a reality show called Nun Moms. I would watch every single blessed second. Make this happen, TLC, and I'll forgive and forget that whole Honey BooBoo mess.

I identify with this posture, it's the shoulder shrug gesture of someone thinking "I didn't really read the instructions".

Jia—will you do a story dedicated to people saying "it's not fair!" in the most ridiculous of situations?

Ladies and gentleman, I give you the tale of Saint Basil Fuckoff, the patron saint of waiters and bartenders.

Just had to get this in: Mary Tudor was queen of England, not France. Also, there's not conclusive evidence (to the point that something like hysterical pregnancy before technology can be conclusive) that it was a phantom pregnancy. Mary displayed all the symptoms of pregnancy, but, of course, never had a baby.…

I was reading this all like "Right on Kate, this is funny and could almost be a real bio for a Bachelor contestant, but I love the absurd pieces dropped in here and there, haha."

That wide-barrel curling iron got a fucking WORK OUT during the photo shoot for those Bachelor contestant profile photos.

What about vaginal apathy? Do they have lasers for that yet?

More proof that rapists don't really care what you're wearing. This victim was in a tux for christ's sake.