It’s a sex thing. Patrick edited out a bunch of stuff about that from the original draft of this, probably for the better.

Let’s not throw stones. Who among us hasn’t overcooked it in that exact tunnel multiple times?

“... hit a set of spike strips going 115 MPH, subsequently barreled off of the road and into a drainage ditch, launched the truck into the air and landed on a car parked at a restaurant” 

“Well, it’s in Hazzard, it’s in a hurry and it ain’t a Duke. So whoever that fella is, he’s probably up to no good. “

For upping all those awesome slutty Harley Quinn costumes last Halloween!

*looks at author, sees it’s not Torch*

410 Superamerica.

Another dimension? Another dimension.

“welcome to my bwoah”

In case anyone was wondering about the Spanish being spoken, he’s saying:

Since Porsche 911 GT3 Rs all have the biggest, dopiest, most adorable grin in racing, I have to appreciate that The Racers Group gave theirs blue lighted teeth for the 24 Hours of Daytona.

A Camaro with gull wing doors?

Hood rich, bitch!

We got him a $500 Craigslist gift card. He bought three Jeeps with it.

Confucius say,

A Mustang drives into a bar...

What do Dale Earnhardt and Pink Floyd have in common?