Crazy doesn’t get tired. Crazy is DETERMINED.

Also I feel like Mira Sorvino is wearing a decade’s worth of statement dresses to make up for how much of her career was lost because of that serial rapist and I love that. Get it.

Yes! If they’re getting poop on their fingers they’re doing it wrong! Also, forget wiping a baby’s butt, if they’re so concerned with poopy nails, wtf do they people with long nails do when they wipe their own grown-up behinds???

Right? I have a three year old. She was in diapers for 2 years. I can count on one hand the number of times I had poop on my hands. And while we’re at it, I don’t get all the memes that imply mom’s are covered in spit up and milk and poop all the time. I literally never got her poop on any shirt.

I thought the same thing. I don’t have a baby, but if I did, I feel like I would def pay anyone to change diapers if I could afford it.

Wouldn’t it be just as hard, if not harder, to get poop out from under short nails?

??? I was a nanny for a long time and I have always had long nails. You just...wash your hands and use a brush under your nails real quick? Also...if you’re doing it right you don’t necessarily get poop on your hands...?? That’s what wipes are for? Maybe she wears gloves?? Who cares??! Sorry for all the question marks…

Can I be honest? If I was rich enough, I would pay someone else to change my baby’s diapers.

Ah yes, one of our culture’s #1 favorite pastimes: mommy judging. Mixed with Kardashian hate and it’s got to be irresistible.

Nick Offerman is too good for us!

This is totally off subject and not Dirt Bag related at all but whatever.

Thank you!! You made thursday nice!

It is also possible not to communicate with friends and family without it, which is where the real magic begins.

Horrible individuals, horrible to each other, and play Ireland in the middle whenever possible. (So the good gossip rags say)

Because I don’t know who anyone is I googled T-Pain. Apparently he got married when he was 18, or possibly 17, and they’re still married (he’s now 32.) This must set all kinds of records, no pun intended, in the music industry.

I absolutely loved Chris Hemsworth in Ghostbusters, he was hilarious. Also, funny in Thor Rangnarok. I am totally on board for him in Men In Black, here’s hoping it’s more MIB I then anything else in that series.

Fuck PETA. They aren’t about what they want you to think they’re about.

I really hate Jezebel video. All the video clips are from articles but the articles aren’t there. There are no links to the articles. They just randomly come up. How many times do I have to be told that Fergie got bit by Tarantino? 50 times apparently. Hey did you know that Fergie got bit by Tarantino? Oh, you did?…

Alicia Silverstone had what might be the best response to a divorce.

I had the same response to the trailer for Red Sparrow as JLaw did over the first 3 minutes of Phantom Thread but at least she got to go to whore school.