My favorite part of this is her sliding silently out of sight.

Well a lot of those Jews didn't complain about the holocaust right away. I mean if something bad happened they should have reported it to the police.

I would like to point out that this dumb motherfucker's apology includes the phrase "a different tact." Tack. Tack, you dumb fuck.

I'm real tired of people getting more outraged when the rape victim is a child than a grown woman. Real fucking tired of it.

Don't want to discourage any of them because visiting new places is always interesting, but why Roanoke? Are you or your bf really into trains?

That sounds exactly the right amount reminiscent of 80's exercise vids.

Clitorcize.

This. Just this. Dumping sriracha on everything is saying to the world, "I never want to taste anything even slightly different ever again. Just textures for me, please!"

There is a precedence to this though. Bill Gates wound up making his fortune when someone noticed his firebreathing act when he used to open gratis for REO Speedwagon, and Warren Buffet got his start working for free as a ring girl in backyard wrestling tournaments that were frequented by Wall Street talent scouts.

I've had a lovely sriracha bread pudding with homemade ice cream. I can even stretch my imagination to a non-abomination sriracha ice cream. (maybe). But, i've just seen people pour fucking sriracha on shitty vanilla ice cream. It's like everyone I know is constantly losing lunchroom bets with an invisible middle…

SHOTS FIRED

Sriracha is the fedora of hot sauce accoutrement

The sugar packet story is like how I regard people who dump sriracha over everything. Like, first, you didn't even taste it, and second, why the fuck are you putting sriracha on curry? and toast? and corn on the cob? and ICE CREAM??? what is wrong with you people??

It's a dry insanity...

On site now as Rebecca Rose, but forever in our hearts as Burt. Where my other Jez old-timers at?

I'll stop using "Mama" in reference to June if everyone else stops using "Dr." in reference to Phil.

the toddler "did not disclose any information that would warrant a criminal investigation."

Also: whatever else you do, be quick and decisive, do your damage, and then get the fuck out of there.

I WILL PULL YOUR DUKE'S COMMENT OUT OF THE GREYS, KIND SIR OR MADAM!

I get the feeling that whipping out a ruler would strike Alton Brown as ridiculous, but only because he seems the sort who would use calipers.