Okay, both are things I’ve done, and both involved graveyards. When I was in college, I went to a party with my friend, and as we wove unsteadily back to our dorms, we had to pee quite badly. So, being drunk teenagers, we ducked behind a nearby wall and did our business. The next week my class took a trip to the…

I discovered my little sister scribbling all over the bishop’s bible while my baby sister was being baptized. Oops.

This cultural appropriation has to stop. This is disrespectful to the ancient traditional costume of the North American Hobo

So I don’t do twitter, so maybe this is a silly question because it’s super common, but why did he retweet himself?

God, yes. And they’re usually so stuffed they dont even fit under the seat. Fuck you and your “personal item”, lady.

Lol. I was sitting here trying to figure it out, thinking this must be an episode I missed or something...

Kinja! Sorry I double posted

Now if we could get Willow’s help on this...

I know in humans they use markers based on average features in a given age range, race, and whatnot, but I have no clue how to do that with an entirely new species.

I also read how they have extremely curved fingers, and we’re likely either living or hunting/gathering in trees, which is pretty cool

I’ve decided to move to Poland if he wins the presidency. That’s it. I’m done, America

On the upside, using quinine sulfate douches will ensure that your vagina doesn’t get malaria!

“Excuse me, idiots” is my new favorite opening salvo. Thank you

I teared up when I realized my little sister was about to start high school this week. I don’t know how to deal when she goes to college

That fight scene is everything. I love it so much. Better than the fight in the first movie.

Can we talk about the other big news story on the screen, “NOT A BEAR ATTACK”? I want to know more

I feel like you could get this treatment for free by not showering and then riding the metro.

It seems to me that the same people who insist that they support the military and veterans yet fail to get them the care they deserve once they are disabled are the same as those who are pro life yet have no interest in helping needy children once they are born. This has been a depressing day for the social contract

I just wrote almost the same thing. Who asked him to be on their radio show??

Omg. I missed that part, probably blinded by the rage blood coming out of my eyes and my whatever.