He won’t make it that long. I’ve resigned myself to the fact that I will never get the opportunity to finish ASOIAF in book form.

The poo-choo train will exist. Those prescient bastards...

Surfed for five hours and am now watching the HIC Pro at Sunset Beach simultaneously with college football. A drink has been poured and an edible was snacked on. It has been a good day.

Ever shop at Costco? There’s a reason why their workers are affable and content, they are paid a living wage with health care benefits. It shouldn’t be a difficult concept to grasp, but many retailers in America fall short.

Not that Michael Cera, this Michael Cera.

Seems like a big ‘fuck you’ to Holder as well for calling Comey’s decision a mistake. I’m sure everyone unfamiliar with this story will be shocked to hear that Holder took the side of a criminal financier.

Should have told Samantha that her children’s school might be integrated, would have scared the shit out of her.

Speaking of squirrels, I was recently in New Hampshire for a wedding and I decided to spend the day in Boston doing various tourist things before flying back home. At the Bunker Hill Monument there was a white squirrel, a white fucking squirrel, just flaunting its exceptional fur in front of all the gawking humans. It…

Just goes to show that even Seuss’s genius didn’t rub off. Nice that Cindy Lou found love though.

“All I need are some tasty waves, a cool buzz, and I’m fine.” - Alolan Dugtrio, probably.

It was a bush league apology.

Ha! You fool, she merely uses violets to mask the ever-present smell of sulfur that emanates from her. It’s referred to as ‘snow job’ in the WikiLeaks.

It’s gastly.

Chumming, which these assholes were doing to lure sharks, conditions them to associate humans with food. This tends to not bode well for surfers.

Why can’t we just recognize Don as a woke bae, he clearly kneads this.

Isn’t that essentially the pro-Cosby argument?

Oh, Billy, Billy, Billy...this is a biggie.

The comparison is an injustice against Cartman, as he’s shown a considerable amount more tact and humanity in his 20 years on television than Donny.

Is Trump’s bae woke?

Yep, turned it off fearing it was causing permanent brain damage, so I poured a drink and turned on football.