I take it all back. Chris Sale is an imminently reasonable person. Those uniforms should be a war crime.

“Robin needs to go into the front office, get put into a headlock and get savagely beaten for us.”

“Robin is the one who has to fight for us”

Don’t know you and I hate THE but fuuuuck you. He dismissed a player for choking out his girlfriend and you say that shit? With everything going on in Baylor.. Tennessee.. And you crucify him for doing the right thing? Fuck you man.

“this was totally unjustified but let me outline the reasons it might be justified but it wasn’t! totally unjustified! but she’s not blameless!” if something is unjustified, then there’s nothing that justifies it so nothing that came before matters because the action cannot be justified by it.

Both discrete and continuous time are mathematically impossible, therefore Mixon could not have thrown this punch I rest my case.

If you think that Outback looks bad, you should see what a bear does in the Forester.

That’s a hefty contract. I guess there was no way the Bronco’s were gonna get Miller lite.
I guess now that he’s getting all the money he’ll be living the Miller High Life.
I guess this was a real Miller Genuine Draft 64 Lemonade???

Maybe I shouldn’t have tried for a third one.

2? That’s nothin’. Darryl was taking 8 balls.

The bat flip without the follow-up fist to the face seems so hollow. I would vote for a Flip-Fist ticket in a heartbeat.

If you’re going to be impressed, you shouldn’t be afraid to show your emotions.

Vote for me—because I can't!

If LeBron quit just because he lost 4 finals, he wouldn’t have won three. Or some other hot take that doesn’t make sense. Look, all I’m saying is that LeBron is a better soccer player than Messi.

Always tryna get at that 2nd Amendment.

Even Ranger’s players put their hands up to guard against Odor’s wild fists.

@Lionel Osbourne: I won't. I own the complete Get a Life.

ESPN will never, ever do this again