It's almost as if being relieved of all his work responsibilities combined with already being financially set for life lifted some sort of weight off his chest!

The Pats have been extra-fun to watch this year.

There are active rapists in the NFL.

Every other NFL player is more unlikeable than Rob "Yo Soy Fiesta" Gronkowski. If you disagree, you are a miserable human being with no inner sense of joy and wonder.

to make the gamers more comfortable, the upper deck was then filled with their parents.

Call me when somebody leaves Taco Bell without a damaged rear-end.

Wow, it's almost as if some beers aren't meant to be consumed in sixpacks at a time.

Somewhere on Reddit, a guy is complaining that they had it first. And masturbating. Always masturbating.

Roger Goodell has suspended the soccer ball for two games.

So, that means either my wife or my girlfriend is cheating on me. Bitches, man.

People knew it was Winston when they noticed that nearby FSU campus police were looking the other way.

Clearly this is a victory for all men who've ever accidentally mistook their significant other for a burglar while shooting them repeatedly as they screamed for help from behind a locked bathroom door.

It means the comment will be bringing a date to the party/wedding/what have you.

Riley Cooper: [Wipes Off Blackface]

I would like to see local authorities come up with a descriptor for beating a woman that is something other than "Simple Assault." There is nothing simple about repeatedly jumping on a woman, then punching her multiple times.

In my best Deadspin commentating fashion: apparently reading is difficult for you. It's not the comment - I expect that, and honestly it's part of the attraction of the site.

The point I was making is that Gawker Media decided that the answer to the rape/muder gif nonsense (which is awful and stupid) was to a) make…

So, the only comment to make it out of this "pending" bullshit is one making light of a 24 year old man being killed ON THE PITCH.

I've been a big fan of Deadspin and related sites, but this is fucking stupid - you allow the dumbest shit comments while seemingly judging other comments on some entirely other rationale,…

I would like to give you a clinical punch in the face sir.

Maybe too soon, chief.