That happened to someone around here last summer. Took a swim in our local river and died for their troubles. Now I'm just kind of like...you're pretty to look at, but I'm only going in if I'm wearing full scuba gear.

"Ok, so you're raw-vegan-paleo, but are you fallen fruit only? Are you? ARE YOU??"

*sigh* Starting a new list of things to be irrationally afraid of. Kidney failure, aneurysms, gangrene, flesh-eating bacteria, supervolcanoes, tapeworms, velociraptors (damn you Larissa!)...

Most laws of kashrut/hallal make perfect sense if you look at food quality and public health issues from back when they were written. Shellfish carry botulism. You can die from botulism. So no shellfish. Pork can give you tapeworms. You can die from tapeworms. So no pork. The milk/meat thing is a little more…

Look, as long as it's the undesirable brown or poor white ladypeople killing themselves with back alley abortions, falling down stairs, and questionable herbal concoctions, it's fine. We need to protect delicate rich white ladypeople because those are the only ladypeople who count. It's so simple.

I could watch this gif for days.

I was prescribed Sprintec because it's generic and therefore cheap. The weight gain is kind of a hassle but any excuse to kick up my gym activity is ok by me, and as I said above, I'm horny all the time. All the time. In a lot of ways it's kind of awesome.

...But would you willingly give your child the nickname Daffy? Because that's the only possible outcome with a name like Daffodil.

I got 758. I used to be faster. Oh well.

Ugh. I finally had to switch to Sprintec (generic Ortho Tricyclen) because it's $9 a month, even without insurance. Since I started Sprintec I've gained 15 pounds without really changing my pretty-damn-healthy diet and I'm 75% certain it has made my carpal tunnel worse.

Murgatroyd is my new favorite name.

My last boyfriend was extremely commitment-phobic. A couple of times I tried to bring up possibly moving in together sometime in the future and the conversations ended in huge fights. We split the cost of my NuvaRing - I'd pay one month and he'd pay the next. I had to be very careful how I explained this to my friends…

*sigh* I miss NuvaRing. It made me murderously angry for one solid day per month (a week before Ring Out Day, without fail) but it didn't make me gain weight. Too bad it was $50 a month with insurance. I have four other prescriptions a month and the ring was more than those four combined.

People who text at the movies should be subject to Hunger Games-style death arenas, except the winner is summarily executed too.

A cursory google search for B'Cardi came up empty, but that doesn't mean anything. The last time I looked for Te'Quila there were 10 or 12 scattered around the US.

Dunno. According to Wikipedia (which is never wrong), it's probably a corruption of an obscure Biblical name, Iskah, or Jeska in Britain during that time. It would be interesting to find out, though.

William Shakespeare invented the name Jessica. It didn't exist before The Merchant of Venice.

I've always heard it as A-a.

Great minds think alike. I remember reading the Clinton thing, and also remember reading someone describe President Obama as the first Asian president because he had lived in Indonesia and had stereotypically Asian values of hard work and educational aspiration, etc.

My mom saw a chiro for years because of her crippling CTS. Ended up needing surgery twice.