This was the first time I remember someone making fun of him, it’s all I think of any time I see him. The fact that Phil Hartman has been gone so long (and Jan Hooks too) while Trump is with us is mind boggling.

Comparing him to Bobby Newport is perfection, I wish I’d thought of it.

IIRC her first pregnancy was difficult and their son was born prematurely, so it’s surprising to me she was the one who wanted more kids.

I went to see JMC 4 years ago at a free concert and my ears are still ringing.

I just had this conversation with my fiancé an hour ago.

I mean, that’s the thing, isn’t it? I have a shit job but could put on a push up bra and put myself into debt for a sports car but the shear energy to play a character all the time looks exhausting. It’s the same reason I never went goth in high school.

That was Kimmel, but still, fuck Fallon.

Still one of the best line readings ever:

You just walk out the door in it and give everyone a thrill, because the circus comes to town everyday now muthafuckas!

Meow meow is a state of mind. It can’t be destroyed.

Meow meow!

I like Hiddleston, but will never forgive that little twerp Redmayne for cheating Michael Keaton out of an Oscar.

Donna was my favorite. I can’t forgive them for what they did to her.

We visited in May and I got my picture taken with Randy. I felt like a big deal.

Thank you for this. I’m marrying in November, and having a bigger wedding than I’d probably have liked. But at 43 I’m the youngest of my family’s grandchildren, and we’ve made sure to hire a good photographer and videographer since this is the last time some of these people will be in the same room, at least for a…

At least a grand in most cases. Besides the money, it often takes 4-6 months for a dress to come in after ordering it.

I would want everyone to know. EVERYONE. Then they can come crawling to me and I can tell them to fuck off.

Twist!

I would like to second this, I was shocked how much I loved it.

I’m getting married in November and I’m 200% sure my family thought I would have a Star Wars theme wedding. Now look, I love me some Star Wars, but I’m 43 fucking years old, not 7. Which goes to show you how sometimes your family just freezes you in time.