They should get him for those Comedy Central Roasts.

I guess this means that the Blazers assume Lopez is gone. That’s unfortunate, because that floppy haired bastard is awesome.

There’s only one Winslow worth trading up for, and he’s all about Justice with a C:

Sigh. I guess John Oliver is going to have to pee that Bud Lime back into the bottle and return it to the fridge.

We talkin bout resigning?

FWIW his name autocorrects to “Kris to psychology Poring dingus” on my phone.

They will not draft anyone. They will trade their pick for a second-round pick and then trade that pick for cash considerations, and that both the first- and second-round pick they traded will be used on future HOFers.

He still has to walk across the stage when Philly calls his name though.

“There have been better attempts at blogging, and they have been made by penguins”

This is how strange I am. I actually help prebuss the table. When I am done I gather all the unused plates and utensils into a helpful stack (big plates on bottom, small plate on top) and put all the utensils on top, then put it on the side of the table closest to the server so she/he and just swoop it up in a pass…

I’m not the only one who feels this way.

Your mother wouldn’t let you leave the dinner table until everyone had finished. The etiquitte standards should actually be higher in a “fine dining” establishment.

It literally never occurred to me to have a strong opinion on this either way... But boy do some people already have strong opinions!

he says hunched and noodles and i am sure it was fancy noodles but i am just imagining gollum hunched over noodles with butter.

I think you missed the part where I noted that it didn’t apply to high-end places. If a table for two is coming to $200, that constitutes a high-end place. It’s expected that you’ll take more time at a nice restaurant than at Applebee’s.

So if one person is a human vacuum cleaner, everyone else should hork down their food to keep up with them? Or if one person is a super slow-mo eater (me), everyone should forcibly pace themselves?

What actually is the going rate for monogramming a thermos nowadays, anyway?

Yes, you keep explaining at length why you believe your preferences are correct and anyone who doesn’t share your preferences is wrong. That doesn’t change the fact that many, many people don’t share your preferences, as just reading this comment section makes clear, and servers are tasked with keeping their customers…

Everyone is supposed to eat at the same pace? Why should everyone be beholden to slow eaters? Particularly at a restaurant where your slow pace is not just holding up your dinner guests, but those waiting for a table. I’m a slow eater myself, and always make sure to communicate to our server that they can ignore my…

“Yeah, that’s not cool,” said Professor Funkelschlotz.