You gotta pay the troll toll to get into the lost boy's hole.

Uncle John's bathroom readers.

No, that's the rest of Texas. Austin's where you move to escape those folks.

Always thought SXSW needed more snipers trained on the crowd.

Sometimes you don't have to get old. I had some colon related medical problems I won't go into, but spent a year in and out of hospitals hearing, "you're too young to have this" about 3000 times a day.

Was he married to anybody before his current wife? Because she was 20 or 21.

As long as you have a level 70 toon on the realm, you can already play a Demon Hunter.

I'm good w/ OKC Thunder, because at least they didn't choose another name celebrating land theft during native genocide.

Teti is moving onto "Black Bag," a super weird Gawker subsite that's dedicated to most fringe conspiracy theories.

perfect swimmer's physique.

People want something to root against, so they're making up their own narrative.

bored old former cold war operatives now work for hollywood marketing depts.

I just saw this, & didn't find the metaphor to be as overbearing as the reviewer did. I watched it as a supernatural creature movie. It might be because I had a couple of teens in front of me loudly having a conversation throughout the movie. I couldn't tell what they were saying, since they were speaking Spanish, but…

I work at a marina, & we occasionally get super glossy luxury boating magazines sent to us. They're basically lifestyle porn for aspiring rich white assholes, featuring not just absurdly expensive boats, but a whole variety of tacky rich guy shit. I think they stay afloat (har har!) because they really do have a good…

Breaking News: Nothing happened.

Saw this live earlier this year. I assume it's the same set. Loved it.

For a long time the page for Three Six Mafia cited Guy Fieri as a founding member.

I didn't either until a sequel to Blood Feast came out a few years ago, & it had all the same clunky, eccentric hallmarks of the original.

I grew up near an Odd Fellows cemetery. They're having problems now, because nobody new has joined, & all the Odd Fellows are a thousand years old, & can't take care of the cemetery. Always thought it was a really neat one.

I think that song made my skin several shades paler.