He lends them to anyone looking for his dick.

If he fumbled the exchange shouldn't it be scored as an error?

Yes. That's why they wandered around naked before Eve ate of the forbidden fruit. And why, afterwards, Adam and Eve got their asses evicted.

My money is on ill-tempered, mutated sea bass.

We were one digit off from a Chinese restaurant. My parents were very patient with callers, but my brother and I delighted in taking orders and then butchering them when we read it back to the caller. Forty-five minutes to an hour later, when their food hadn't turned up, they would call about it. It was always "on its…

Well not with Stop and Frisk anyway.

Lebron is gone? It's like a teaser trailer for The Leftovers.

"Johnny Manziel's penis ..." The Chuck Norris joke 2.0.

Somewhat Immortal for a While

I think it's a tribute to the man that my first reaction to almost anything is, "how cool would that sound if Morgan Freeman said it?"

Agreed. This is the first television program I've ever rewound just to rewatch a visual sequence. Makes me want to go back and rewatch Pushing Daisies.

Like a fat man distroying a Denny's bathroom.