Sabathia is the second-greatest midseason rental of all time.

Yeah, sure, but also fuck the Yankees. 

Bros before d’ohs!

“Don't Stand So Close to Me" also takes on a creepy factor when you realize Sting had been a teacher before the Police formed. 

“...they fear that one of the groups (“Thanos-like”) will be given pink slips, with the other told it is safe.”

Khalil Mack was also an unannounced guest when he came in to sack Cousins on air because there was no one who bothered to stop him.

He never sold his house in Orange County and spends the off seasons there, which is why Brad Ausmus was fired by the Angels almost immediately after Maddon.

It's the Mariner Way. 

The Mariners haven’t been serious about winning a championship in decades. Their organizational philosophy is to give the minimum effort that allows them to pretend they’re chasing a pennant without actually investing in anything or running any kind of risk. It’s pennant race cosplay - all sizzle, no steak, looks good…

These guys fight with the skill and grace of three sleepy manatee trying to fuck a beach ball.

My girlfriend’s sister had mono when we were all in college. I was terrified I’d get it because my girlfriend was the super jealous type and she would have accused me of kissing her sister or something. And the last thing I’d want is my girlfriend yelling at me because then my wife would find out.

I kinda wish Colin Kaepernick could just pull an Enrico Palazzo and show up to the Jags game in a semi-convincing Gardner Minshew disguise, throw for 250 and a TD in a win, then pull the mask off in post-game interviews.

“...all while harboring an increasingly dangerous secret.”

Can we check and see if he’s doing sit ups in his driveway yet?

Maybe, but then everyone probably would’ve just shown up late, plus we wouldn’t have been treated to a surly, late-night crowd enjoying Bencic’s meltdown. Meltdowns are brutal, but nobody enjoys finding humor in the misfortune of others like a US Open crowd.

I’m still a cat 4, I would be thrilled if I got some upgrade points this season, I’m racing age 40 now so maybe I can have some luck against the older cat 4/5's (and staying away from the masters 1-4 field where I’d get killed lol)

I really love the English Premier League on the weekends, I’m always up early anyway so that really suits me and I can just have some decent soccer on during my morning coffee. The older I get it, the less bandwidth I have for sports, it seems, I seem to only have capacity for so much besides just casual following…

I followed the same progression and even took it further- why pay $30 to kill myself in a cross race for 45 minutes (forever a cat 3) when I could just go ride mountain bikes all afternoon? Although now I have a kid so it’s back to cyclocross since that takes less time.

I used to get really stoked for football, but the last few years I just can’t stand just being home and watching tv on Sundays when I could be out enjoying the fall weather. In the past I’d go on some nice long bike rides, but last year and this year I’ve gotten into cyclocross bike racing, which is super fun off road…

Funny, they told me the opposite if i stopped holding my Marvel Comics in public i might get a girlfriend.