...god damn it.

*your

“While it’s a great story and all, Beyonce has the best light-up bracelets of all time.”

Silence. The Swift heals all with her magic, and wonder. Feast your eyes.

You’re move, Perry.

Taylor Swift Concert Bracelets End Up Saving Teens’ Lives

Uhmmm I think the idea of bracelets that synchronize with music sounds like an AWESOME idea, even without them saving lives. I want one.

Right before she starts dragging her uterus across the carpet.

Bill Gotherd, the dirty old man who founded ATI, likes his women with long, curly hair. So they get perms.

her face said: Bob put more babies into my uterus

I want Magyn smear them sooo bad

Is this supposed to be some sort of adoring gaze? My dog looks at me like this when I put him in the bathtub.

Is there some sort of Carnegie-style course that teaches people how to do this style of submissive-defeat face on cue?

My mom had one of these hemorrhage 7 years ago and it very nearly killed her. It was a very long road to recovery, she stuggled to speak for many months, but she is miraculously back to baseline, and recently completed the Camino de Santiago de Compostela in Spain.

According to court records, Hutchens’ Yahoo profile screen name was “dadsluv2002”; under his interests, Hutchens listed “Strangers With Candy,” “Kinki Kids,” “Child Play series,” “Puberty,” and “Pre School.”

I need to say something terrible and I’m hoping some Jezzies will back me on this: I cannot WAIT for the Lifetime movie about the Duggars/the quiverfull movement.

DUDE I saw that when I read the piece (which I had never read before until writing this)! There are so many pictures of both of us in both of those articles! I WONDER WHYYYYY

“Could you BE any more pedophile?” -Chandler Bing, Friends

Every single story about these guys. Every single story.

For such a fan of the old biblical ways, the Duggars sure are fans of modern-day litigation.