I don’t think “it’s satire” answers the questions as well as you think it does. It’s still a baffling thing to release.

Well there was one at the board meeting who said he didn’t get it, but a few days later he washed up on the Santa Monica beach with a jade egg lodged in his ass.

Somehow, I get the feeling that the executives and staff found it hysterically funny and those who didn’t would never admit it.

Just rinse it off, it’ll be fine. 

What if you find it in the bathroom of a Chili’s?

Without researching it, I’m going to assume “Looking out for number one” refers to Goop’s claims that sticking its $90 vibrator in your hoo-hah benefits your urinary tract health—which is important after drinking two martinis. Just like double-fisting helps clear out your colorectal system.

I saw it.

Sony doesn’t need our help, but the fanboy whining to push Sony to give Marvel/Disney everything is what is being criticized.

I always felt Skyfall was supposed to be bridging the serious Craig to a return to campy. The switching over of M, build to the hat toss and the whole final act being a bit home alone definitely felt like it was trying to show some sort of transition.

People keep saying this, but the camp flavor of Bond is what all its imitators aim for. Do you really want Bond to be on the same level as a Fast & Furious/Charlie’s Angels/xXx/Kingsman movie? What can a “fun” Bond movie do that those franchises haven’t done already?

That was done in the 90s, especially with Die Another Day, and it didn’t work, hence how we got to this version of Bond. Also, those films were incredibly un-PC and sexist and you know that absolutely won’t work in today’s age.

Ahem...

““Accountability” means lobbying for a person to lose a job”

No it doesn’t. 

People get mad at studios for giving a project about a different race or culture to a white guy all the time. That’s a thing that happens on a regular basis. It’s one of the reasons why Marvel and DC have picked female directors to helm their female superhero movies. There’s nothing flawed about it. People rightfully…

a) Spanish people can be blond and b) I’m sure you lit up the stage as Fred “1917" The Conquistador. Maybe high school thespianism just wasn’t your raison d’être?

Way to miss a whole point, bro. But sure, take it that way. 

A small percentage of people think it’s inappropriate.

Oh man... What a surprise that Mr. “non-sarcastic question” pivoted immediately to arguing in bad faith and lazy hyperbole as soon as someone pushed back.

Especially considering these three gems from his recent comments

Not sarcastic, maybe, but a far cry from sincere.