I’m shocked that your favorite lettuce isn’t “butter”

Are we sure this case is so clear cut?

What about the other two Jeffs that will still be able to screw up football games?

Too much Wagner and Dvora(k)

Everything Deion knows about educating young men he learned at Prime Prep Academy

“What’s wrong with Feudalism in New England?”

This is ridiculous.

Is the ref dating John Kruk or something?

The good news is that Roger Goodell’s contract money is guaranteed

Blake Bortles Barely Bothered By Bad Broadsides?

UNPOPULAR OPINION ALERT:

Really? No one said the Trump Administration? No one? Really?

Holy fuck, that was depressing. And accurate.

Tom Brady has the patience of LBJ and the intelligence of Roger Clinton

82, huh? I wouldn’t have guessed he was a day older than 81.

I thought the Blake Bortles “problem” was crystal clear, as in the bottom of a liquor bottle.

Sadly, that was also Sean Salisbury’s pick up line at ESPN

(Seriously, though, this was a fantastic piece and your work is a huge part of what keeps deadspin relevant)

Your work is so good that I only sometimes think of this when I see your byline: